Sometimes life throws you into situations that make you question your everyday habits. I’ve been in such situations over and over again. And like the idiot I am, I’ve never quite asked myself why I find myself in such situations.
In fact, that’s not true. I asked myself, and I found the solution. What I failed to do is follow up with those solutions to make my life a little better.
Some circumstances in recent times have made me ask those questions myself again. Why do I find myself in situations that leave an impact on my mood and mind? Why can’t I avoid them and lead a peaceful life? Is being peaceful a dream that I’ll never see come true?
After giving all these questions some careful and deep thought, I’ve come up with a couple of decisions that I wholeheartedly wish to follow.
The first of those decisions is to never let my feelings get in the way.
You know how people advise to follow your heart? Well, that is important, to follow your heart, but sometimes, your heart is stupid. Despite your best intentions not to hurt yourself, you end up hurting yourself and you only have yourself to blame for it.
In situations when you have the feeling that you’ll end up hurting yourself if you follow your heart, it’s best not to follow your heart. If your brain and heart give you contradictory solutions, listen to your brain. Your heart is stupid.
That’s the first challenge for me. I should stop giving any attention to what the heart desires. It’ll be difficult. It is difficult. But I need to force myself to be able to do this. Otherwise, I’ll just keep repeating the last five years of my life.
And trust me, they were terrible.
The second thing I’ve decided is to share as little as possible, even with the closest person I have in my life. Ultimately, it all comes down to yourself. Someone close to me once told me, you are alone when it comes to your sadness and depression. I didn’t want to believe her. But time has come for me to believe that she was right.
People seldom care about the things that make you sad. People generalize. People judge too much.
People are bad.
Maybe that’s just me being introverted, but my interaction with my own species hasn’t been all that friendly so far. And the number one mistake I’ve been making over the past few years is to share what’s making me sad.
That’s a major mistake. If you’re reading this, don’t do it. It not only makes you weak, it makes you emotionally vulnerable. That’s a seriously bad position to be in: emotionally vulnerable. You’re better off being vulnerable to worse things like being beat up by enemies. At least, you will have visible bruises and they’ll heal over time.
When your emotions are played with, you only have yourself to blame for it. That’s one extremely hurtful situation to be in. I’ve been there way too many times. And it’s high time I put a stop to it.
Sure, nobody’s life is all flowery and peaceful. Life is difficult. Life is strange. But I’m thankful to be in a position that’s a lot better than many others. Still I have these things that take my mood down to the ground. If I can’t control these, I’ll continue to have a miserable life.
That’s why from today, I’ve decided to take another step back from interacting with people and expecting something from them. This gives my already introverted nature a bit of extremism, to the point of being unsocial; but hey, you have to be happy yourself before you can put yourself to good use for others. 🙂